How Do I Win Over the Older Ladies?

How Do I Win Over the Older Ladies? //

How do I win over the older ladies?

Some of my answers to the first two questions apply here. (Read them here and here) Be the best you can be at all times. Yes, it’s a lot to ask, but as a pastor’s wife, you have stepped upon a pedestal (in many people’s eyes), so you need to live it out. Only through regular personal connection with God’s Word for guidance and repentance for frequent failures and sins can you maintain such a lofty obligation. If you are an extrovert, your willingness to speak to others will not be a problem, but if you are more shy or reserved, you might need to overcome that so you don’t expect others to make the first contact.
The older ladies in a congregation are usually the pillars upon which the church grew, and they (1) are emotionally attached and (2) may be dependent on the congregation activities to fulfill their life now. You know that each generation is equipped with a certain mindset, based on their life experiences and the moral climate of their upbringing and culture. When a young person seeks to interact with an older person, I believe it is the younger person’s obligation to try to understand where the older person is coming from, rather than the other way around. Ask God to give you more humility, discernment, and respect, in order to effectively relate to the older people in the congregation. Teach your children (and model) polite but genuine conversations and actions. You may have opportunities to help or work with individual ladies, (as well as the group efforts in the kitchen or nursery, etc.), and those experiences will endear you even more to the older generation. Remember how much people communicate to each other. You definitely want to be spoken about in a positive light every time!

Julie Keat


Wife of Rev. James D. Keat for 46 years
Mother of Jennifer, Bethany, and Jim
Grandmother of Hannah, Grace, and Abigail
Residence since 1998: Leslie, MI
I am an elementary teacher with 10+ years experience in Lutheran schools and 18+ years in public schools. My husband was a Director of Education, a Lutheran school teacher, a Director of Education and Youth, and a Lutheran pastor (LCMS). We are retired but still active in school and church.

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