Have you ever prayed for something, and then felt like Jesus got sidetracked in answering that prayer?
My prayer was for a child.
STRUGGLING WITH INFERTILITY
My husband and I had been married for several years and wanted to start a family.
Months went by. Years even. And we couldn’t get pregnant. I think back to that time of my life and remember a lot of crying. A lot of hope and expectation…and a lot of disappointment.
When we pray for something and don’t receive it, we have two options:
First, we can choose to let that unanswered prayer push us away from God. Ladies, this is the easy choice. This is the choice that says, “I know what I need better than God does.”
Let’s not do that.
Instead, we can choose to let that unanswered pray push us toward God. I’ll admit, this is the harder choice. It involves learning how to trust and let go of what we think is best and give everything to God.
I remember the day that I came to that point.
My husband and I had just purchased our first home. He had to work late one night, so I went to the empty house alone and painted some rooms.
There was a room that was PERFECT for a nursery. It was right off the master bedroom, and it was too small for any other room.
That night, I painted that room. And then I covered it with my tears. I gave my dream of a baby to God. I let Him know that I trusted Him, even if He never gave me a child of my own. I confessed that I would love Him, no matter what.
There was a man in the Bible who understood this kind of pain too.
A DIVINE INTERRUPTION
In Mark 5, verses 21 to 43, we see the story of Jairus. He went to Jesus and begged the Master to come to his house and pray for his little girl.
His daughter was dying. And Jairus was desperate.
And it seemed like his prayers were answered. Jesus said yes! Jesus went with him (verse 24).
But on the way there, a large crowd followed them and pressed around Jesus. I can imagine Jairus tugging on Jesus hand and saying, “Hurry, she’s dying. I need You to come before it’s too late.”
But Jesus got interrupted by another need. A women who had suffered for many years touched the cloak of Jesus and Jesus stopped to speak to her and the crowd.
Jairus was probably beside himself. If they had had watches back then, he would have been checking it every 20 seconds. While Jesus was still talking, Jairus saw a few people from his home coming up to him. Their faces didn’t look good.
They told him what he had feared. His little girl had died.
Jesus heard the news and said, “Don’t be afraid; just believe” (verse 36).
Jesus stopped the crowd from following Him expect for a few close disciples and when they came to Jairus’ house, He went inside and said, “Little girl, get up.”
And she was raised back to life.
Let me ask you something…
What gives God more glory? Healing a sick girl? Or building the faith of a father by raising his dead daughter?
What gives God more glory? Getting pregnant easily? Or building the faith a mom by opening her womb after waiting for so long for a child?
Sometimes what we see as interruptions are actually ways for God’s glory to be best displayed.
A PURPOSE FOR YOUR PAIN
I didn’t get pregnant that day. It was about 4 or 5 months later that I discovered I was going to have a baby.
My husband and I had a son, and 10 1/2 months later, we had another one.
Because of that time of pain and waiting, I committed to raising my children in the knowledge that they were miracles. And that they are world changers.
Now, if I had the chance to go back and do it again, I’d choose the pain. I’d choose the waiting.
If you’re in the middle of your waiting and pain, that statement may seem crazy.
I want you to know that I get it. You’re hurting and confused and even frustrated. It’s okay to feel those things. And it’s the prayer of my heart that you choose to let your circumstances push you towards God instead of away from Him.
I wish this blog post had all the answers, but it doesn’t. I don’t know why some people have children easily and couples who would be amazing parents struggle to conceive. I don’t know why one woman may be diagnosed with cancer, beat it, and then get diagnosed again. I don’t know why a family loses a child to suicide or why a elderly parent gets Alzheimers. I don’t know. Only God does.
But what I do know is that you are loved by Him. And He has a purpose for your pain.