Ask any couple who’s been married a long time, marriage takes effort. Even the best marriages require intentional effort to stay strong. Rarely are these efforts grand gestures of love. More often, it’s the little, unnoticed things we do that bring us closer. Lately, I’ve been trying to find simple ways to improve my marriage and I want to share something powerful I’ve discovered: How to change, improve, and better your marriage through a single cup of coffee.
How do I take a boring cup of coffee and make it a powerhouse? Prayer.
Prayer is powerful and intentional prayer has a targeted effect. When we pray, we are aligning our will with that of the Father. And there’s nothing better, in my book, than petitioning him for his will to be done. I invite you to join me by daily praying the following prayers over your marriage.
As you fill your mug, pray that your (marriage) cup would be overflowing. Pray not only for satisfaction in your spouse, but for overflowing joy in each other’s company. Boldly ask the Lord to bring forth intangible blessings in your relationship. Claim the abundant provisions of Psalm 144:13 and praise the Lord for the new things he is about to do.
If you choose to add creamer, pray against dilution in your marriage. Pray that your love would not lose its salty taste (Luke 14:34). Pray against being lukewarm toward your spouse (Revelations 3:16) and ask for a dynamic “hot” to fill you deep to the core.
If you add sweetener to your coffee, pray for renewed intimacy with your spouse. Song of Solomon speaks of his beloved as “sweeter than wine.” Pray this over the love you have for your husband. Petition our Father for a deep desire for intimacy. Ask him to sweeten the love of your husband and make it rivaled by perfect love alone.
When you stir your coffee, pray that the mundane would, also, be stirred up. Pray that the words of Isaiah 43:19 would ring true in your marriage. Thank the Lord for the newness that he is going to bring and ask for grace to scale the mountain, if that is what he calls you to. Newness, while always beautiful in the end, often requires us to grow. Our Father’s plans are for our good, but the path is often rocky. Trust that he knows best. Believe that this “new thing” will strengthen your marriage and be willing to go where the Lord calls next.
If your coffee has a bite, pray against bitterness. Ask the Lord to reveal any areas of pride in your life. Then pause for a minute to allow the Spirit to work. When pride or sin is revealed to you, repent. Don’t let it remain in your heart any longer! If the pride is something committed against your husband, immediately go to him and ask for forgiveness. If he is unavailable to talk, send him a text message or email. Pray over the message as you hit send and then thank the Lord for revealing this hidden sin in your life.
When you take your first sip, thank the Lord for declaring marriage “good.” Genesis reveals to us that all of creation is deemed “good” in his sight. Praise the Lord for creating marriage to mirror his love for us. Praise the Lord for his renewed mercy and grace.
Even if you are experiencing a rough patch, praise him. Scripture calls us to look outside of our current situation and feelings. We are compelled to honor God in the midst of our struggles as an act of worship. Take this opportunity to praise him despite your flesh. Thank him for his goodness and choose to believe that his plans are good.
As you dump the grounds, pray against separation in your marriage. Be intentional and utilize Scripture to fortify your relationship. Mark 19:6 shares, “Therefore what God has joined together, let no one separate. (NIV)” Pray against any attempts to destroy your marriage. Claim the indestructible power of God as “glue.” If specific temptations or sins come to mind, call them out. Pray that “no weapon formed against [your marriage] would prosper. (Isaiah 54:17)” Verbally pray against their power and declare them defeated (1 Corinthians 15:55-57) in Jesus’ name!
I encourage you to pray these intentional prayers over your marriage every day. I’ve seen God do incredible things when I deliberately pray day after day and I believe he will do the same in your life.