Whether you’re a stay at home mom, a working wife, or working mom I have something you need to hear today. Quit trying to do it all. You know what I mean. Between balancing housework, motherhood, a job, and that never ending to-do list (you know what I’m talking about!) in the back of your mind. Even if you met just one of the descriptions listed above, you have a lot on your plate. And it’s time to rest.
You can’t run and run and run forever. You, dear lady, have to rest. Trust me, this is a daily battle so I totally understand how difficult this is. But you must take care of yourself sometime. You were not created to carry everything on your shoulders. If your husband isn’t contributing or trying to help, sit down and talk to him. If he won’t change after that heart-to-heart, seek Godly counsel. It’s not okay for him to be unsupportive.
I am here today giving you permission to delegate. Or to let some things simply wait. You are human and after pouring out you must be refilled. When I’ve had a rough few days, or maybe the opposite, sometimes I’ll let my husband take our son and I will go take a relaxing bath. It’s important to recharge and also to start filling up before you’re burned out (or running on empty!).
This principle of filling up before you’re empty isn’t talked about, but it’s a new lesson I’m learning. I am a stay-at-home mom but I also help Hannah run the Young Wives Club. Some weeks the workload is light, others are heavier. I’m still trying to learn that balance between mother and working mother. My point is, if I didn’t make time for myself I’d go insane! The sacrifice is real though. Sometimes choosing me means not choosing the full sink. Sometimes choosing me means saying no to social media.
You don’t have to do it all. Everything will be just fine if you choose to let some things go. It isn’t worth your stress or worry, trust me! I know how hard it is to say no to housework and yes to yourself. In fact, I still fail at it 90% of the time. But with God and my husband’s help, I’m making greater strides toward resting more and stressing less.
Kristina Kuzmic posted a really great video the other day. In it, she said something to the effect of, five years from now when you look back a clean house won’t matter; but your sanity will. I want to enjoy this season of life. I want to enjoy my little baby boy while he’s little. So, in effort to do that I have started changing my priorities. That isn’t to say that a clean house doesn’t make me feel better, because it definitely does. But for right now, where I’m at in life, I must get into the habit of resting.
Even if your husband can’t help around the house (or won’t) that doesn’t mean you can’t rest. So try starting today! While the kids are down, or maybe when you come home from work, get comfortable, close your eyes, and breathe. Take five or ten minutes to simply rest. Talk to God about your day, your struggles, and your victories. Then get up and do whatever you need to. Start by stealing a moment and go from there. That’s all it takes. This is doable, and if you’re guilty of working yourself to the bone, you need to do this. If you’re still skeptical, then perhaps commit to trying it once or twice. Evaluate how you feel and then decide for the future whether to continue or not.
Let me say this in closing, you don’t have to do this every day. I don’t. If you can, awesome, but I don’t do it every day nor do I always have time to. What I do do on the other hand is try to schedule some time during the week (sometimes just once or twice) to hand over the baby and go relax. Sometimes it looks like me reading in solitude, uninterrupted in our bedroom. Other times it looks like me taking a relaxing bath. The time is yours, so you decide what to do with it. Give yourself grace for the season you’re in and don’t neglect your personal relationship with God. In some of the hardest seasons, my relationship with Him was the only thing that kept me afloat. You can do this.